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[Note, please read “A Picture is Worth a Thousand Orgasms” first.]

Lo got me up from my slumber. Well, part of me was already up since she wouldn’t let me climax earlier in the night. She had been switching off watching episodes of “Gilmore Girls” and MILF porn since I had nodded off. Now she was ready for a second helping and she had been coaxing my cock to an upright and locked position prior to my regaining consciousness.

“Daddy,” she whispered sweetly, leaning over so take my meat in her mouth.

“Yes Lo?”

“Can I tell you what I was thinking about?”

“What’s that, Lo?”

She took a few more licks and then she lay down next to me, her fingers stroking between her legs. That’s when she told me what she had been viewing.

“I imagine,” she began, “Jess and Dean arrive at Lorelai’s house at the same time, each thinking that he’s going on a date with Rory. When they meet on the porch, each carrying a bouquet of flowers, they stare each other down and then exchange some snide words. Rory hears the voices and comes to the door.” At this point, Lo began acting out the scene. A little known talent of Lo’s is that she’s a great actor, just not in front of an audience.

Rory — What is going on?!

Jess — Why don’t you tell us? I thought we had a date.

Rory — You and Dean?

Dean — This is no time for jokes, Rory. You and I had a date tonight.

Rory — Wait here.

Rory runs upstairs to Lorelai.

Rory — I’ve got a problem that makes Elizabeth Bennet look positively quaint.

Lorelai — Really Rory? I can’t find my coffee maker. And you think you got troubles.

Rory — You’re looking in your bedroom. Did you try the kitchen?

Lorelai — Of course I tried the kitchen. That’s why I’m in the bedroom.

Rory — Did you bring coffee to bed?

Lorelai — Maaaaaybeeee.

Rory — Why don’t you just go to Luke’s and get his coffee?

Lorelai — And bring him to bed?
Rory — No! Anyway, can you help me or not?

Lorelai — Not until I have my coffee.

Rory — (Sitting down on a pile of laundry. She picks up dirty panties and a bra and discovers a coffee maker.) Here!

Lorelai — You are destined for Harvard!

They walk downstairs.

Rori — . . . and so I guess I told both of them I’d go out with them tonight.

Lorelai — Nothing wrong with a ménage à trois.

Rori — Mom!

Lorelai — What? I’m just saying, if it’s good enough for Lou Salomé, it’s good enough for you.

Rori — Her name was Lou Salomé, but you know everyone called her Loose.

Lorelai — Rory! You know I’ve taught you not to slut-shame!

Rori — Can we get back to the. . .

Suddenly they hear thuds from the porch. They run to the front door. Jess and Dean are throwing punches and wrestling. Lorelai separates them by getting between them.

Lorelai — Hey! Hey! Hey! Calm down!

Both of the boys are roughed up and Jess is bleeding from the nose and Dean has a black eye. Rori runs to get a towel and ice. She returns and gives the ice to Dean and applies to the towel to Jess’ nose.

Dean — Oh, so you take care of him and just give me a cold sack of ice?!

Rori — He’s bleeding!

Dean — And I have a black eye!

Jess — And I’ll give you another.

Dean — Oh yeah?

Lorelai holds down Dean while Rory holds down Jess.

Rory — I’ve had enough of both of you!

Rory runs off into the night.

Lorelai and the boys go inside the house and they sit in the kitchen while Lorelai brews coffee.

Lorelai — I can’t believe you two. You act like cavemen. Don’t you know how to treat a woman?

Jess — [Ashamed.] No. My mom was never around.

Lorelai — Oh yeah. I forgot sweetheart. [She puts her hands through his hair.]

Dean — I was just. . . well, I guess I just am so damn jealous.

Lorelai — It’s not jealousy, Dean, it’s hormones. You’re all backed up with testosterone. When’s the last time you jacked it?

Dean — Wwwwwwhat?

Lorelai — You know: chocked the chicken, spanked the monkey, beat the meat.

Dean — I, I, I. . .

Lorelai — You see, you’re just too uptight. You have to learn to relax a little bit. [She runs her hand down his chest to his crotch.] Look, I think I know how we can find a way for the two of you to work together. Follow me.

The three of them go up to the bedroom. Lorelai strips naked and pulls down their jeans. She positions Jess in front of her and Dean behind her and bends over. The two of them are going at it with her and she’s about to cum when in walks Luke.

Luke — What the hell is going on here?!

Lorelai — [With a mouth full of Jess’ cock.] I can explain.

Luke — Explain?! Rory said you’d probably need me to break up a fight and make some coffee.

At that point Lorelai positions Jess below her so his cock is in her puss with Dean’s.

Lorelai — Come here, Luke. If you’re hung anything like Jess, then — I never thought I’d say this — the coffee can wait.

When Lo was done acting all this out, she pulled out her two dildos, putting both in her puss and taking me in her mouth, going at me like never before. I finally came deep in her throat and she came in convulsions that shot out the two dildos followed by a cascade of girly juice.

“Holy shit!” she said.

“Holy shit is right,” I said. “You deserve an Academy Award for best writing, direction, acting, and best picture.”

[From the blog:]

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Just your average nymphomaniac next door. I love fan mail:

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