Member-only story
As you, dear reader, are well aware, I am of a different generation than Lo. That doesn’t keep us from having fun. Frequently I find myself at parties surrounded by people twenty years or more my junior. For the most part, I’m a good sport about it. However, there is one activity that these younger folk engage in that I simply cannot stomach: Playing “Cards Against Humanity.” Call it a delicate sensibility or a prudishness of a bygone era, but I find this particular card game to be repulsive. Luckily for Lo, I’m a good sport and see that, like all things on this big blue planet, there is something to be learned from it.
Perhaps due to my generational difference, not only was I of a dissimilar temperament than those enthusiasts of the game, but I found that I was also ignorant of some of its terminology. Late one night, while playing this perverse pastime, I happened to pull the card that read: Anal Bleaching.
What?
I found myself having to inquire as to what the hell this meant and I was informed by my young companions that this is, indeed, a thing. Women, it turns out, actually bleach their anus in order that it have the proper luminescent halo around it. Ass angels, I suppose.
Well, my dear reader, allow me to tell you that one of the first times that Lo and I were engaged in a prolonged, pleasurable, and piquant entanglement of bodily…