J.O.I. — Jill Off Instructions

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[Recently Emma Austin posted a column about finding lots of JOI (Jerk Off Instructional porn for guys, but almost none for women. It reminded me of this story H.H. wrote about me from our first book. I hope you enjoy.]

One of Lo’s college girlfriends was off doing a semester abroad. Lo and her friend, Michelle, were casual acquaintances at school, but because Michelle was in a part of the world that Lo longed to visit, they kept up communication on Facebook and e-mail. Being so far away and in a very foreign environment, Michelle was having great difficulty forging new friendships and, more importantly, finding intimate partners. One day, while chatting on-line, Michelle happened to mention her frustration. With a little encouragement from Lo, Michelle opened up about her inability to get laid and her pent-up sexual energies. Lo asked her, rather blatantly, “Why don’t you just jill it?” Michelle was a bit embarrassed and did not know how to respond, but she admitted to Lo that she doesn’t do that because she feels too self-conscious and, furthermore, she hasn’t been able to bring herself to orgasm in that way — ever. Lo gave her a few instructions involving a long shower, moisturizing lotion, incense, candles, and a mirror. Lo encouraged her to explore her body and to imagine to herself how much money men would pay just to see what she was doing to herself.

Michelle followed Lo’s instructions and persisted at it each night for a few days, but she still just went away from each session feeling more frustrated and unable to reach her goal. So Lo suggested that they Skype each other (ah the benefits of technology) so that Lo could walk her through the process, step by step. On the appointed night they made the connection and Lo slowly removed her clothes for Michelle, encouraging Michelle to follow suit. She did and soon the two of them were sitting naked in front of their respective computer screens and cameras with their legs spread and the two “windows” open: one for the person on the other end and the other showing themselves. The Skype session was a success! It took over two hours, but eventually Michelle got off and, of course, my little Lo got off numerous times. Since then Michelle has discovered what works for her and has used her new-found techniques to great effect. She wrote to Lo to thank her and said that Lo should have her own sex-ed course called: Lo Dishes the Down-Low: Helping Women Help Themselves.

This altruistic offering of sexual healing showed Lo where her true calling was — in the field of sexual self-help. Needless to say, such helping of others has provided hours upon hours of self-help for Lo as well.

[From the book: Match, Cinder & Spark, Volume I: Nymphomania and the Single Girl, available in audio format February 14, 2020]

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Just your average nymphomaniac next door. I love fan mail: downloladown@gmail.com

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